Thinking this morning about Matthew and about how we never know what tomorrow might bring. We have no clue who will be celebrating their last Christmas this year. Someone we know and love could be gone next year. So it has crossed my mind that now is the time to make memories! Show those we love how much we love them and how special they are before the opportunity is gone forever and regrets fill the space where memories should live.
When I think about Christmas of 2009 I always think "I had no idea that would be our last Christmas." Come January 8th, Matthew's birthday I am so glad that for one of the very few times I gave Matthew a really special birthday celebration. I had no way of knowing that we were celebrating his last birthday. We had a great Christmas, we had a fabulous birthday weekend and I have those wonderful memories to keep my heart alive. Now I need to make sure that I make heart warming memories with my family and friends. Matthew will always and forever be apart of my holidays, and a void will remain but he would want me and his family and his friends to enjoy the holidays and love each other and keep traditions and make more of those memories.
For me I must make that effort, and I vow that I will make the effort to make this Christmas a special, loving and memorable one. Even though I am struggling again this year that is not the memory I want to leave behind. So it's time to look forward and make some plans to make this Christmas as loving and joyous as possible. It's my Christmas wish to make it the best Christmas for all those I hold near and dear! It's a challenge and I fully accept it! It is my life and my Christmas and I will make it a good one!
